When Newcastle mum Dani Paranthoiene felt her baby move for the last time, she didn’t know her world was about to change.
In 2021, at 32 weeks pregnant with her first child, she suffered a placental abruption, a devastating complication.
After years of trying for a baby and finally succeeding through IVF at Adora Fertility, Dani was counting down the days to becoming a mother.
The abruption caused her little girl, who she and her husband named Bonnie, to be stillborn.
“Nothing prepares you for silence,” Dani said.
“You go into that delivery room expecting to hear a cry and, instead, you’re met with heartbreak.”
Dani says the silence surrounding stillbirth is one of the hardest parts of grief.
“People don’t talk about it, and yet six babies are stillborn in Australia every single day,” she said.
“That’s more than the national road toll.
“But, we don’t see awareness campaigns, we don’t see conversations, we just see parents grieving quietly.”
In the years since, Dani has channelled her grief into action by honouring Bonnie’s memory.
Every year on what would have been her daughter’s birthday, she donates hundreds of keepsake items to families who are experiencing the same unimaginable loss.
This act of love, from beanies small enough to fit on a tiny head to blankets held in the palm of a hand, has brought comfort to parents across the Hunter.
“It’s my way of keeping her memory alive,” she says.
“When you lose a baby, all you want is to remember them and have something to remember them by.”
Now a mum to two healthy children, three-year-old Inka and 17-month-old Hartley, Dani continues to speak openly about stillbirth in the hope that it encourages others to do the same.
“October is Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month, and I just want people to know it’s okay to talk about it,” she said.
“Acknowledging these babies, saying their names, and supporting their families means more than you could ever imagine.”
At Adora Fertility, Nurse Unit Manger Holly Beasley says awareness and compassion can make a real difference for families who have experienced loss.
“Education is so important,” shey said.
“Things like monitoring your baby’s movements, sleeping on your side in late pregnancy, and avoiding smoking can help reduce risks.
“The more awareness we can create, the more lives we can potentially save.”
As October shines a light on infant and pregnancy loss, Dani hopes her story reminds others to hold space for those who grieve.
“I’ll always be Bonnie’s mum,” she said.
“If her story can help even one family or make someone feel less alone, then that’s something special to come from something so heartbreaking.”
For more community stories:
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- Lunchbox Rally bonds mother and daughter
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